The Very Best Girl
by Dying Rebel
Summary: Kid may seem like a symmetry crazed lunatic, but he actually does love Patty.
1. Chapter 1

**Jane: **Hey guys! Okay, so I've been on a story telling roll lately, so I'm gonna try to make sure this story kicks ass! Tell me any thoughts you have on my story, and I hope you enjoy. Oh, and I don't own anything.

**Chapter 1**

"Patty! God dammit! That's not funny!" Death the Kid screamed at half of his weapon pair. "What's not funny, Kid?" Patty had just come downstairs from her room. She had been getting ready to go on a date with a battle ax boy named Liam she'd met at school yesterday. They were going clubbing (don't worry, it's an all ages club) and she had on a pair of charcoal jeggings, and a silky black shirt with red cherry blossoms on it. She had ruby dangle earrings and her short hair was pulled into a bun with two sparkly red butterflies on either side of her head. She thought she was dressed with perfect symmetry, because Kid would get all depressed and or yell at her. He seemed to be going with the latter. She just didn't get it. She was sure that she'd...oh. She noticed it now. Her shirt only had one sleeve. Damn, how couldn't she have realized before. Patty did the only sensible thing one could do in that situation. "Bye Kid, I would change, but I'm late and you kinda suck when you're mad! Toodles!" Patty ran as fast as she could across the foyer and out the door into her date's black convertible.

"Dammit! Now she's gonna make a cow of her asymmetrical self." Kid swore under his breath. Unfortunately for him, Liz had seen the whole thing. Kid cringed and slowly turned around to see angry Liz glaring at him with a hand on her hip. Uh-oh. He knew he was screwed if she was being bold enough to be asymmetrical. "Why can't you ever let the symmetry thing go, especially with Patty. I thought you were seeing Miss Marie about you're OCD?" Kid looked down, not wanting to see the look on her reaction. "Well, I haven't really been seeing Marie." Luckily for Kid, he couldn't see Liz's scowl become even more ominous. "And why is that?" The anger in her words actually stung Kid's ears. "Because, um, she's asymmetrical." Liz's scowl turned into shock. "What?" Kid sighed and looked up at her face. "Her eye, it's asymmetrical. There's only one with an eye patch." Kid closed his eyes, expecting to be hit with either a punch, or explosion of anger and yelling. So he was pleasantly shocked when she said "Okay. Then Patty and I will help you." Kid opened his eyes and smiled. "Really?" Liz rolled her eyes. "Yeah, whatever." Kid's eyes welled up with tears of joy. "Thank you Liz! Oh thank you, thank you, thank you!" He jumped in the air in an attempt to hug her, but she moved away at the last second, resulting in Kid's face smashing into the staircase. "Don't get so worked up about it. I'm going to bed. Since tomorrow's Saturday, we'll start at eight am, okay?" Kid got up, crying tears of joy and pain. "Yes, that sounds fantastic!" Liz rolled her eyes again and replied "God, you're so freaking weird!"

Patty and her date were making out in the corner of the club. A few people who passed by would yell at them to get a room, which was met with both of them flicking off the haters. Liam broke away for a minute. "Hey, do you wanna go back to my place?" Patty smiled for a moment, but it faded. "I can't, Kid will get so pissed if I'm not home in," she checked her watch "oh crap, twenty minutes!" Liam looked extremely confused. "But, babe, it's only 7:40." Patty rolled her eyes. "Yeah, I know, but Kid is totally insane. He almost made me change my outfit because it only had one sleeve!" Liam smirked. Well then, maybe we can go back to your place so your not in trouble." Patty smiled. "That might work." Liam grabbed his keys, and they ran out of the club and into his car. Then they floored it back to Kid's mansion.

Kid sat in the foyer waiting for Patty to come home at exactly 8:00. He tapped his right foot eight times. Then his left. He continued alternating until the clock rang at the exact same time the front door opened. Kid smiled. "Well done Patty. You beat your record." Patty through her hands up in the air and yelled "Yay!" Liam nudged her and she remembered what she what she was going to say. "Oh, yeah. Um, Kid? Would it be okay if Liam stayed the night? Please?" Kid frowned. He never had a problem with Liz and her boyfriends, but he didn't like the idea of sweet and innocent Patty having her heart broken by some random guy. But if he didn't let her have her way, she'd cry. He hated it when she cried. "Fine. But he has to be gone in twelve hours. Deal?" Patty's face lit up and she ran up to give Kid a quick hug. "Thanks, Kid!" Kid gave a half halfhearted smile that Patty didn't even see, because as soon as she let go, she grabbed Liam's arm and dragged him upstairs to her room. Kid sighed. He sulked up to his room and got ready for bed. He then made sure he was in the exact middle of his bed and fell asleep.

He had a horrific dream that night. He and Patty were looking through the dictionary to find words with eight letter or syllables. Then all of a sudden, Liam walked in with a greedy look in his eyes. He walked right up to Patty, grabbed her, and threw her on the floor. Kid tried to get up and kick Liam's ass, but somehow he was rooted to the spot. He was forced to sit and watch as he transformed into a giant snake. The snake coiled around Patty, squeezing her until she was blue. Kid heard her use her last breath to say "I love you, Kid." Then the snake unhinged it's jaw and swallowed Patty whole.

He woke up in a cold sweat, breathing shallowly, with Patty jumping on his bed singing "He's gone! He's gone! The jerk face is gone!" Kid caught his breath and asked "What?" Patty sat down and explained. "You were screaming a lot in your sleep, and I came in to hold your hand so you wouldn't sleep walk, like you do sometimes. Then Liam got really mad at me for being with you instead of him, and he told me if I didn't leave you alone, he'd leave. So I kicked him out." Kid stared at her in disbelief. His horrific nightmare had actually worked in his favor. Then, Patty started giggling. "What's funny, Patty." Patty stopped giggling for a second to say, "Nothing, it's just you had a HUGE boner while you were asleep!" She walked out of the room laughing, and Kid laid back down and tried to get some more sleep before his big therapy session with Liz.

**Jane: **Well, that was my first Kid and Patty story. Sorry if it got a bit scary, Kid.

**Kid:** I wasn't scared. Not-not at all!

**Patty:** So you weren't even a little worried about me?

**Kid: **Well, I, um...

**Patty: **Ha ha ha! I'm just screwing with you!

**Kid:** Dammit Patty!

**Jane:** Whatever. Just, please review and subscribe!


	2. Chapter 2

**Jane: **Hi guys! I really love reading your reviews and just knowing how much you love my stories. It always makes me smile!

**Kid:** Yes, if only the number of reviews were symmetrical.

**Patty:** Ha ha ha! Kid, you're stupid!

**Kid: **Leave me alone Patty! You and Liz are supposed to help me get over my OCD, not make me feel bad!

**Liz:** Speaking of which, if you don't wake up Kid, you're gonna be late.

**Kid:** Dammit, you're right! Why was I wasting my time with an introduction? It's not like Jane owns us or anything!

**Jane:** True, but it's nice of you to show up. Anyways, on with the show!

**Chapter 2**

Kid rushed out of bed, got ready in precisely eight minutes, and then walked downstairs to meet Liz and Patty at the bottom of the stairs. Liz spoke first. "Well, we thought you'd never make it out of bed." Liz had a slight smirk on her face. Kid rolled his eyes and replied. "Really, I thought you'd know better than that by now." Patty ran up to Kid and gave him a throat constricting hug. "Howdy, Kid! Ooh! Can I call you Boner Guy?" Kid blushed a dark shade of pink. "Patty, I really don't think that's…" Liz interrupted. "Wait, why would she call you 'Boner Guy' Kid?" Kid swallowed. '_Oh, shit.' _He thought to himself. '_She thinks I did something to Patty. Damn!'_ Liz glared at him, waiting for a response when, like a miracle, Patty spoke up. "Hey, aren't we supposed to teach Kid not to freak out about stupid shit?" Not the words Kid would have chosen, but effective enough none the less. Liz gave Kid one last death glare. "Fine. Let's start."

Patty walked away for a second to grab some large white cards. She came back a few seconds later, and handed the first one to Liz. "Ok Kid, we're gonna show you some cards. Don't say anything though. We just want your reaction." Kid stole a glance at Patty, who wasn't looking at him, but a butterfly instead. Kid nodded. "Let's do this." The first card Liz showed to him was a number eight. Kid smiled. The next card was the number seven. Kid frowned. The third card was a picture of an eight with sevens intertwined in a symmetrical fashion. Kid's eyes twitched. His mouth was a straight line; no expression was demonstrated at all. Then, Kid's nose bled and he fainted on the floor. Patty laughed. "Ha ha! He pulled a Soul!" Liz sighed. "Well, I guess that's enough for one day. Patty, could you drag him to his room?" Patty saluted and nodded her head. Then she grabbed Kid's shirt collar and dragged him up the stairs like a rag doll.

Kid woke up with his head hurting like a bitch. He sat up and saw Patty making origami cranes by the foot of his bed. She noticed he was awake and sat up. "Oh, hi Kid! How was your nap?" She giggled when she said that last part. Kid must've looked confused, so Patty elaborated. "You got a boner again. Ha, you're dumb!" Kid blushed even darker than before. He decided to change the subject. "Why are you making paper cranes?" Patty rolled her eyes like the answer was obvious. "To make you get better. Duh!" Kid remembered the myth in Japan that said if you make a thousand paper cranes for an ill friend, they'd magically heal. He chuckled to himself. That was just like Patty to believe such a childish tale. He thought it added to her character. "Well Patty, it must've worked, because I'm all better now. See?" Kid leaped out of bed. Patty frowned. "I won't believe you until you, um… ooh, I know! Dance!" Kid's shoulders sagged. "Dance?" He asked. "Yes, and sing at the same time!" Kid had to think fast. No way in hell would he EVER sing. "You know what would be better, Patty? How about I take you to the carnival? Would that be alright?" Patty jumped up and down on his bed with child like excitement. "YAY! I get to hit those creepy clowns with eggs, right Kid-kun?" Kid sighed. "Yeah, sure." With that, Patty grabbed his arm and pulled him all the way to the carnival without stopping.

**Jane: **Sorry to leave you guys on a cliffhanger. I thought the chapter was getting too long, so…yeah.

**Patty:** Aw, but we were getting to the good part.

**Liz:** I still want to know why Patty called you Boner Guy, Kid.

**Kid: **I can't tell you, it doesn't matter anyways.

**Patty:** Ooh, ooh, I can tell her!

**Kid: **Patty, NO!

**Jane: **Review or Patty tells Liz.

**Kid:** Dear God, please review!


	3. Chapter 3

**Jane: **Hello! It is time, for chapter three of The Most Wonderful Girl.

**Patty:** YAY! We get to go to the carnival!

**Jane: **Yep, that's right Patty.

**Kid:** Patty, I know I said I'd take you, but do we really have to go?

**Patty: **WHAT THE HELL DO YOU MEAN, ARE YOU TRYING TO BAIL ON ME?

**Kid:** No, no, it's not that. I just, uh, want to make sure that's what you want to do.

**Patty:** Oh. Well, thanks for making sure Kid, but I do REALLY want to go to the carnival.

**Kid:** Great to know Patty. Then let's go have fun.

**Jane:** Aw, poor Kid. Oh well, nothing I can do about it. I don't own anything after all.

**Kid:** But you're writing the story!

**Patty: **Ha ha ha ha ha!

**Jane:** Now, let's go to the carnival.

**Chapter 3**

Patty dragged Kid all the way to the carnival without stopping. When they got there though, Patty collapsed from exhaustion. "Patty! Are you okay?" Patty murmured something Kid couldn't hear. "What is it? Patty are you okay." He heard her this time. "...funnel cake." Kid's worried tone evolved into an irritated one. "What?" Patty suddenly leaped up and started chanting. "Funnel cake! Funnel cake! Funnel cake!" Kid rolled his eyes. "Patty, of all the carnival foods to choose from, why funnel cake. It's totally asymmetrical. All it is is dough randomly spiraled in oil. There's absolutely no consistency." Patty gave him the cutest and saddest puppy face she could pull off. "Please, Kid?" Kid saw her eyes start to water. He knew she was faking, but he still couldn't refuse. "Patty, you're one damn good actress. Fine, you can have your funnel cake." She squealed with delight. Kid smiled. Her being happy made him happy.

They got to the concession stand and Patty ordered a funnel cake with chocolate. Kid found a bench in front of the merry go round. Patty plopped down next to him and tore a piece off of the funnel cake. "Hey Kid. I want to try something." Kid gave her a questioning look. "What Patty? I'm not buying you anything else until you finish your funnel cake. She smiled and shook her head. "I want you to close your eyes and do everything I say." Kid sighed, but did as she asked. "Open your eyes." Kid opened his eyes. "Close them." He shut them again. "Open your mouth." He did. "Close it." He did. "Open it, and keep it open until I say close." He opened his mouth. Patty took the piece of funnel cake and held it right over Kid's tongue. She waved her hand in front of his face to make sure he didn't peak. No reaction. "Alright Kid, close." She dropped the food and pulled her finger out right before he closed his mouth. Kid, slightly startled by the new presence on his tongue, opened his eyes tho see Patty giggling softly. He tasted the substance. It was sweet in two different ways. The most prominent was sugary, the other was rich and sweet, without it being overpowering. "What did you put in my mouth, Patty?" She giggled again and pulled the funnel cake out from behind her back. Kid stared at it in amazement. A totally asymmetrical object, but it tasted great. He was confused, but he just shrugged and took another piece of cake. "See, that wasn't so bad, was it, Kid?" He looked into her eyes. Her perfectly symmetrical, blue eyes. She'd done what no one else was able to do. For a moment, he'd been relieved of his obsession with symmetry. Patty laughed. "Come on Kid, let's go one the Ferris wheel! Kid smiled and let her lead him to the ride.

They did everything in the park except the Twirl-a-Whirl, which they wouldn't go on because they were both pretty sure the would puke if they went on, and the games. Patty went over to one of the booths. The objective was to knock down all the bottles off a pedestal with one hit from a baseball. Patty gave the man three dollars for three tries. She missed the first two times, but the third one knocked two off the pedestal, and the other one over on it's side. The man who ran the booth told her she didn't win anything and asked her to move along. Patty looked sad for a moment, but then she want to play all the other booths. Incredibly, she'd one the top prize for everything. The carnival was closing soon, so Kid and Patty went to the first booth again to give it one last go. Patty lost again, so Kid decided to give it a try. He determined the right amount of force and speed necessary to make all the bottles go flying. He paid the man one dollar, for one try, aimed, and knocked every bottle off the pedestal. The man shouted "Winner!" So that every one within a three yard radius could hear. "What prize do you want Patty?" Patty looked at all the cute stuffed animals sitting on the shelf. She scanned back and forth until she saw it. A plush giraffe with big button eyes and a thread smile. "That one! Can I have the giraffe please, Kid?" Kid smiled at the innocence of her smile, and the excitement she showed towards something so simple. "Sure Patty. Excuse me, the giraffe on top, please." The man handed the giraffe to Patty, and she hugged it tight. "Thank you so much Kid, you're the best ever!"

They walked to a bus stop heading back towards Kid's house, and sat on a bench until their ride came. "Today was the bestest day ever, Kid!" Then her smile turned into a frown. "What's wrong Patty?" She looked up at Kid and seemed to get even sadder. "Well, I just felt really bad because you didn't seem to do anything you wanted." Kid sighed. "Patty, I had a great time today. You know what makes me really happy? Being with you and seeing you laugh and smile. Now if you want to mess stuff up by getting upset, go ahead. But I've never had so much fun in a long time." Patty looked up at him. He gave her a smile and she smiled back. "Thanks Kid." The bus arrived shortly after that. They got on and there was less talking.

They got home and walked upstairs together. Patty stopped at the top, and Kid stopped with her. "Thanks again, I know I've said it for the twentieth time, but it was just so fun." Kid smiled. "Anytime." Patty fidgeted a bit. "And, um. I wanted to do this all day, but I think now would be the best time." Kid looked confused, as always. "Do what?" Patty blushed. Then she leaned in to kiss him. It wasn't very long, but it sent an electric shock of happiness to Kid's stomach, and other places. She pulled back, blushed again, and ran off to her room. Kid stood at the top of the stairs like an idiot with a boner. Then he smirked and walked to his room where he fell asleep shortly, and had the best wet dream ever.

**Jane:** Yay! Kid got a kiss!

**Patty:** Yay!

**Kid:** Really, is that something you should be saying? I'm right here.

**Jane: **And we're all happy for you.

**Liz: **I don't like the fact that You get a boner every time you're with my sister, Kid. But I'm fine with it, I guess.

**Patty:** Yay! We're all happy!

**Jane: **But the story's not over yet. So review and subscribe! Who knows, maybe Kid will get to second base?

**Kid: **Please review!

**Liz: **NOBODY'S GONNA REVIEW ANYTHING! IF KID VIOLATES PATTY, I'LL RIP HIS THROAT OUT!

**Jane: **Noted.

**Patty: **YAY! Baseball!

**Kid, Jane and Liz: **…..Sure Patty.


	4. Chapter 4

**Jane:** Hi peoples! It's been a while since I updated for this, but it must be done! The flame must be kept alive!

**Patty:** . . . .

**Kid: **Honestly, that's a little over-dramatic, don't you think?

**Liz:** Yeah, well, Jane is over-dramatic.

**Jane:** WHAT? ME? I"M NOT OVER-DRAMATIC! YOUR OVER-DRAMATIC, HOW DOES THAT FEEL!

**Liz:** Thanks for proving my point. Point to Liz!

**Jane:** Okay, okay. I guess it's possible that I can be...histrionic(How awesome are SAT words?).

**Patty and Liz: **_suppressed giggles_

**Kid: **Yeah, a little, anyways aren't you supposed to cleverly put a disclaimer somewhere in the introduction about how you don't own us?

**Jane: **Well I was gonna, before you beat me to it! Oh, and by the way, your picture frame is leaning about 0.007 centimeters to the left.

**Kid: **It's awful! Terrible, please help me!

**Jane: **Heh, I don't own you remember. Ha! I still got to do it! Anyhow, enjoy chapter four.

**Chapter Four**

Kid got up and stripped his sheets from the night before. He was still reminiscing about his dream. He tried to shake the thought out of his head. If Liz catches him thinking about Patty, she'd probably kill him. It was no use though, he couldn't get her out of his mind.

Patty sat in her room, furiously drawing giraffes. It was almost as if she'd forgotten how. Every time she tried, she would end up drawing something that looked like a zebra with a long neck. Instead of yellow, it was white. And instead of wonderfully random spots that could be splattered anywhere, she had eight, completely symmetrical black stripes. She crumpled up her thirteenth attempt and threw it in her waste basket. All she wanted to do was draw a giraffe again! Maybe all she had to do would be to get Kid out of her mind. But tat would be tricky, since he's been on her mind ever since he saved Liz and her from the streets. She thought harder than she ever had about anything in her life about how to forget about Kid. Then she figured it out. She would have to break Kid's heart, and possibly her own. And she had a pretty good idea of how to do it. She would go off the edge.

Kid loaded his sheets in the washer and began making breakfast. He made six waffles, six pieces of bacon, six scrambled eggs, and six biscuits. He made six of four things so that if everyone had two of each, the total number of items on his plate would be eight. He set the table perfectly and aligned everything just so.

"Liz, Patty, breakfast is ready! Come down in thirty seconds, or we won't finish eating before eight in the morning." Liz came down first, make-up smudged, hair messy, eyes tired. Her clothes were a total mess and she was only wearing one slipper. It took every last bit of Kid's self-control to make sure he didn't explode in a feat of rage at her appearance. She slipped into her seat and stared at her food for a while. Then her head fell on the table with a thump. Kid rolled his eyes. He hoped Patty would come down soon, so he could engage with somebody who might be dying. As if on cue, Patty came down the stairs. But her appearance was way more than Kid could handle. Her previously blond hair had been dyed bright red, and was streaked with seven random spots of purple. She had on blue and orange eyeshadow with one eyelid underlined with pink eyeliner, the other with fuchsia (Yes, there's a distinction!-DTK). She had on neon green skinny jeans with a pocket on the right side, but not the left. Her black My Chemical Romance shirt had the right sleeve ripped off and she wore black converse. These would have been fine, except that she had a blue sock with yellow stars on one foot, and a purple sock with red Kishin souls on the other.

Kid stared at her, absolutely shocked. He couldn't believe that she would have the nerve of wearing such an asymmetrical outfit, and that he was slightly turned on by her.

"What. The hell, Patty?" Patty smirked. _Oh my god, it's working! If I keep going, he'll be so ticked! It's actually kinda fun. Maybe I should mess with him more often. _Liz looked up to see what Kid was flipping out about. She looked Patty up and down, smirked and spoke in an evil, gloating tone.

" Wow Patty, you haven't looked so bad-ass since we lived on the streets. I'm impressed. Maybe I should go back to being a hardcore bitch again too. Heh heh." She took a sip of her coffee, and propped her head up on her elbow so she could watch how this would turn out.

"Thanks Liz. I'm going out. Don't wait up for me. I'll probably be home late." Kid and Liz were both shocked wen Patty used her real voice, and not the one she always used to get attention. Kid got over his shock quickly, and now his fury rolled out full power.

"Patty, you look like an asymmetric whore. Now go upstairs and change into some proper clothing, you disrespectful bitch!" Liz stood up a bit from her chair, and opened her mouth to say something, but Patty waved for her to sit back down. She obeyed, but she was scowling now. Patty's smirk grew wider as Kid turned redder with anger.

"Actually Kid, I plan to go out, get off my ass drunk, and do whatever the hell I want. Because although, as you said earlier, I'm a bitch, I'm not _your bitch_ anymore. So you might as well sit back and get comfortable, because you get to watch me march my ass out of this house in five seconds, so I can tear it up with Kim and Black*Star. Deuces, lame-ass!" She turned and strutted out of the kitchen and out the front door with a slam. Kid and Liz stood staring after her, mouths gaping wide open. Liz closed her mouth, smiled, and began clapping. She then tossed the rest of her breakfast in the trash, and went up to her room to post what just happened on Facebook. Kid was left standing alone and sad in the kitchen.

Outside, Patty practically flew in the air out of pure joy. She'd never felt so alive in her life! She thought that would be way harder than it had been. Breaking Kid's heart was going to be a cinch, and she wouldn't even have to break her own to do it. She walked out of the property, and down to town square, where she would meet Kim and Black*Star for some much needed excitement. Boys stared at her as she walked down the street, some girls whispered mean things, but she didn't care. She didn't care about anything right now. She spotted he pink and blue haired friends waiting for her by the fountain. Kim's hair had streaks of bleach blond, but she did something like that every month, so it wasn't that strange. She wore black skinny jeans, red stripper heels, and a pink shirt that matched her hair color. In black letters across her chest, it said "My eyes are up here." An arrow pointed up towards her head. She'd gotten her nose pierced, so now she looked even more dangerous than before.

Black*Star wasn't wearing his typical DWMA attire either. He had on white sneakers, with dark blue stars on the sides and tongues. He had on black basketball shorts and a red tank-top with his autograph written big and sloppily across it. Since he wasn't wearing his collar, a light scar was visible just above his neck. And as always, his star tattoo stood out proudly against his tan skin. They both grinned as Patty walked up to them.

"Wow Patty, you look like you're ready to kick somebody's ass. I didn't know Kid was over his OCD enough to let you go around looking like that. Way to go, bitch!" With Kim, bitch was a term of endearment, so it didn't make Patty mad.

"Thanks." She spoke again in her normal voice, but everyone else was used to it. She only talked like a baby in front of Kid because if she didn't she could never sweet talk him into doing stuff for her. "But, I don't exactly have Kid's permission on my outfit. And I don't think I'm going to need it anymore." Patty sat down between her friends on the fountain's edge as she retold the events of this morning. Kim laughed and called her an awesome, bad-ass bitch, while Black*Star nodded approvingly, stating that that's how all real stars take the stage, by asserting their dominance.

"Hey Patty, would it be cool if I asked Soul and Maka to come hang out with us? You know Soul's cool, and since he and Maka started going out, she's a lot more fun." Kim pouted a bit.

"In that case, we should invite Tsubaki too, or else Soul and Maka are gonna be making out the whole time, and if it's gonna come to that, I wanna have a make-out buddy too." Kim and Tsubaki had been going out for a while, ever since Ox cheated on Kim with some girl. Patty rolled her eyes, but was actually pretty excited. More people was more fun, right?

"Yeah, fine. Call them now before the whole day goes to crap." Kim sniggered, and Black*Star winked at Patty, causing her to blush. Then they both got out their phones and called their people. Meanwhile, Patty's head was racing. _He winked at me! Does that mean he likes me? And if I like him back, will I start drawing blue giraffes with spiky hair and gorgeous green eyes? _Patty shook those thoughts from her head so she could enjoy their time out.

Tsubaki, Soul, and Maka joined them soon, all dressed rather edgy. Soul, in a black Flogging Molly t-shirt, with black skinny jeans that made him look oh so sexy. Maka had on a scarlet tank top that matched the color of her boyfriend's eyes. She had a denim micro-mini skirt and black combat boots. She'd gotten a tattoo on the back of her shoulder recently, and she loved to show it off. It said _Sodalis Vitae, _which meant 'Life Companion' in Latin. She had on silver bracelets on each wrist, and lots of eye liner. She let her bangs grow out, giving her a more mature look. Honestly, she had become the prettiest skank out of all of them. But she still had the same old Maka smile, and she still gave Maka-Chops out generously to anyone who pissed her off. She grinned and went up to hug Kim and Patty, not surprised or even slightly phased, which Patty respected.

Tsubaki came up to them, wearing a lavender t-shirt with the sleeves ripped off. She had spray painted a black rainbow on the front, and had her hair pulled up in a sexy, messy bun that was held together with a black butterfly clip. She had gray jeggings and black ballet flats. Spray painted on the back of her shirt, were the words "Don't f*** with me!". Her indigo eyes shined brightly as she approached her friends.

"Hi everyone! Don't tell me you've started the party without me!" She giggled a little, then walked over to whisper something to Kim, who chuckled at her joke. Kim then pulled Tsubaki in for a quick kiss, then decided to start their wasted rampage as soon as possible.

"Let's get the hell out of here before we've lost our party mojo." She grabbed Tsubaki's hand and pulled her off towards the nearest club. The rest of them followed, for a day that was sure to be exciting.

_Eight hours later- _Soul was grinding with Maka in the middle of the dance floor, kissing her neck as he did so. Kim and Tsubaki were pole dancing (with their clothes on, don't worry) together, occasionally touching their tongues together. Black*Star and Patty were left sitting next to each other on bar stools, barely buzzing, and tired of watching their friends having fun just because they had a high tolerance. Black*Star had a devilish idea, and was about to make things interesting.

"Hey Patty, do you remember when we would have those eating competitions?" Patty nodded, a cautious expression on her face. Black*Star smirked.

"Well what do you say we test our alcohol resistance. It'll be like a training exercise." Patty smiled.

"Why the hell not? It should be interesting to watch you fall off that bar stool when you've become drunker than," she looked at Maka, who was now riding on Soul's back like he was a pony.

"Well, like Maka." Black*Star chuckled.

"I accept your challenge, and since I'm such a big star, there's no way I'll lose!" They ordered ten rounds of shots, five margaritas, and two forties each. Soon they were both completely off their asses, murmuring nonsense to each other, and laughing like maniacs. Somehow, Black*Star managed to carry Patty on his back and carry her to her house.

"Okay, Baby Star. Time for you to go to sleep, so you can become as big as the Sun. Not as big a guy as me of course." Patty giggled in her fake, attention grabbing voice.

"You're funny! But you're so cute, I just wanna kiss you!" Black*Star smiled at her.

"Then why don't you?" Patty tapped her finger to her chin. Then she shrugged.

"Well okay. Close your eyes though. It's a secret!" Black*Star closed his eyes as she said. Patty puckered her lips and leaned in to kiss him. It was a very hot, and passionate kiss. He tried to gain entrance to her mouth by pushing his tongue against her soft lips. She happily obliged and soon their tongues were swirling around together in perfect harmony. Black*Star pulled away, slightly blushing.

"It's always good to leave your fans wanting more." He seemed rather sober from being completely wasted. But perhaps he wasn't messed up in the first place.

"I gotta go get Soul and the others before they screw themselves over. See ya, Patty-koi." Her heart fluttered at the suffix, koi. She watched him walk down her driveway, sighing contently as he left.

Patty stumbled through the front door, up the stairs, and to what she thought was her room. She stripped off all her clothes, and crawled into bed, dreaming about giraffes with spiky blue hair, and gorgeous green eyes.

**Jane:** Wow. That was, interesting. Oh who am I kidding, that was AWESOME!

**Kid:** No. No, no, no, it can't end like this!

**Patty: **Bla blur, grestavou. Ha ha! Giraffe!

**Jane: **Yeah, it won't end like this. Unless people don't review, then it stops right there.

**Kid: **Review, dammit! I won't let it end like this!

**Black*Star:** Aw, but I like it the way it is.

**Kid: **Stay out of this, you bastard!


	5. Chapter 5

**Jane: **Weeeeeeeee! Chapter five, yay!

**Kid: **I. Hate. You.

**Jane:** Why?

**Kid: **Because of what you did to Patty! That really was unnecessary!

**Jane: **Or was it?

**Kid: **...Yes! It was!

**Jane: **Oh ho, but it was quite necessary. Besides, you're gonna love what happens next.

**Kid:** What is it?

**Jane: **I can't tell you! I don't even own you!

**Chapter 5**

Kid woke up feeling depressed. Even more so than when symmetry was off. He still couldn't believe what Patty had said to him. It crushed him. He was even more crushed when Liz posted the events on Facebook and got tons of comments, mocking him. He sighed loudly to himself. _Should I even care about symmetry anymore? What's the point? _He rolled over to stretch out his arms, and was surprised to feel something laying next to him in his bed. The shape under the blanket rose and fell as if it were breathing. Kid pulled the covers off of the shape, and immediately began to feel his nose drip with blood.

Lying next to Kid, dressed in nothing but her black, lacy bra and panties, was Patty. Her make-up was smudged and her hair was messy, but Kid thought she looked beautiful. She stirred in her sleep and ended up pressing closer to Kid. His face flushed bright red and his pants got tighter. Her breasts pressed up against his chest in a way that made him feel extremely happy, yet strangely uncomfortable at the same time. His breathing became shallow, and he tried to back up away from her. Luckily she rolled over to her other side, and Kid was free of Patty's contact. His relief was only temporary, for as she rolled over, she murmured a name that brought up feelings of hatred from Kid's very soul.

"Mmmm, Black*Star-koi." Kid felt like he would throw up. Black*Star? She actually liked Black*Star? That smug bastard! Kid pulled himself out of bed and went to bang on Liz's door. Which was a bad idea, since it was only 5:27 in the morning.

"Kid! What the hell do you want? I already posted what happened, people know. You can't take it off now!"

Kid let himself in and sat on the edge of Liz's bed. He was pouting, and he had his arms crossed tightly over his chest, much like a child would. Liz rolled her tired eyes and sat down next to him.

"What's got you're asymmetrical man panties in a bunch now?" Kid glared at her for a second, but he sighed and relaxed his shoulders.

"It's your sister. What the hell has gotten in to her lately? All of a sudden, she starts acting like a lunatic; dressing asymmetrically on purpose, staying out until three in the morning, talking about Black*Star."

"Whoa, whoa, whoa. When did Patty tell you about the crush she had on Black*Star?"

"She had a crush? All I know is I woke up with Patty in my bed and -"

"What the hell, Kid! How perverted can you get?" Kid shook his head quickly.

"No, no, it's not what you think. She must've been drunk and thought it was her bed. I saw her when I woke up." Liz sighed in relief. Although she could be pretty loose, she never wanted Patty doing anything bad.

"Okay then. Well, you know how Patty's obsessed with giraffes?" Kid nodded slowly.

"Well, she gets frustrated if she can't draw them right. Once, when we were little, her favorite flowers were roses. Every time we slept on a bench in Central Park, she would steal several bouquets from flower stands, and she would surround us with them." Kid nodded for her to go on.

"Well, she would draw a giraffe, but it wouldn't come out right. It would be red with thorns all along the neck. She decided she was going to hate roses so she could go back to drawing normal giraffes." Kid sat up straighter at this revelation.

"So, she started hating me, because she liked me so much she couldn't draw giraffes?" Liz shrugged.

"Yeah, I guess. But if she's been talking about Black*Star in her sleep, she's probably falling for him instead." Kid jumped off of Liz's bed and ran into his room where Patty was still dreaming peacefully.

He kneeled next to her and shook her awake.

"Ugh, Kid, what are you doing?" She glared at him; obviously annoyed. Kid looked at her, desperation in his eyes.

"You can still draw giraffes! You don't have to hate me, or roses, or anything! You can still draw giraffes!" Patty stared at him, her annoyed expression gone, replaced with shock.

"What did you say?"

"You can still draw them, with yellow skin and brown spots!" Patty sighed sadly.

"Kid, you think I want to hate roses, or you? If there was any possible way for me to draw normal giraffes, and still love something else, I would. But since there isn't I can't like you, roses, or anything else." Kid shook his head, almost excitedly.

"Patty, if you can help me get over my symmetry, I can help you get over this. I'll help you learn how to draw giraffes!" Patty's eyes sparkled with a child like excitement. When she spoke, she spoke in her usual silly, yet endearing voice.

"You can? Yay! Thanks, Kiddo! Come, on let's go draw giraffes!" She grabbed his arm and pulled him off into her room.

_Black*Star POV_

Black*Star woke up with a killer hang-over. He looked around the room he and Tsubaki shared in their tiny apartment. Tsubaki and Kim were passed out on the floor, half-empty bottles of vodka in their hands. Soul and Maka were weakly making out on the couch. He wondered how long they'd been going at it.

He got up off the cold hard wood floor, and dragged his feet into the bathroom to wash his face. He was surprised to see lipstick stains covering his well tanned face. His hair had traces of orange dye in it, and a cell phone number was written in black Sharpie on his forearm. Underneath the digits written cute, loopy writing was one word.

Patty

Black*Star smirked, feeling very happy and confident. _I might just need to make a call._

**Jane: **** whispering ** SHHHHHHH! Thanks for reading you guys! Don't give anything about that POV you read away; Kid doesn't know and Patty can't remember. Okay, okay, here they come. Act cool.

**Kid:** Hello Jane.

**Patty:** HIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIII!

**Jane: **Hi Kid. Hey Patty, you seem in a good mood! So, uh, what's up? ** shifty eyes **

**Kid: **Nothing, we just came to do the ending commentary with you, like always.

**Patty: **Yup!

**Jane: **Oh, cool. Well, thanks for reading everybody, review, tell your friends, bye, see you next chapter!

**Kid: **Wait, shouldn't we do something, you know, funny?

**Jane: **Nope. No we should not.

**Kid: **Hmm. Okay then.

**Patty: **BYE PEOPLE I DON'T KNOW! THANKS FOR RANDOMLY READING ABOUT CONFFUSING TIMES IN MY LIFE!


	6. Chapter 6

**Jane: **Pssssst! Hey guys. I'm back from a long, cliffhanger induced break. Well, part of the break was from laziness, but, I digress.

**Kid: **God, you're back? I though everything was resolved? Patty re-learned the "art of giraffe drawing", she washed the asymmetrical colors out of her hair, and we're happy. You being here can only mean more drama.

**Patty: **Yay! Our lives are like the Jersey Shore!

**Jane: **…...

**Kid:** Patty, there's so much wrong with that statement.

**Jane: **Okay then. Enjoy, I own nothing, and, uh...yeah.

**Chapter 6**

Patty was laying on her floor, smiling brightly. Below her was a blank sketchpad, which she had filled with her own pictures of perfect giraffes. Kid had finally made a breakthrough with her, and was downstairs in the kitchen, getting her some ice cream to celebrate.

_Thump-Thump-Thump!_

The young weapon stopped coloring and sat up on her knees. Someone was at the door. But this early? It had been a few hours since she woke up, but even then, it was only eight am. The mystery intruder knocked again, louder than before.

_Thump-Thump-Thump!_

Kid's voice rang out from downstairs. "I've got it!" Patty smiled and picked up her yellow crayon, drawing a baby for a family of happy giraffes. The sound of shattering glass broke her sense of peace.

"What the hell are _you_ doing here?" Kid's voice was seething with rage, unlike what Patty had faced yesterday. Shock spread across her face, and she realized that the only person Kid could possibly be yelling at was-

"Black*Star..." She leaped up off the ground and sprinted out her door. Running to the top of the stairs, she saw Kid glaring at his blue haired foe with a magma hot furry. Black*Star, either oblivious to the Shinigami's anger or choosing to ignore it, shot him a sly grin.

"Kid! Hey man, how's it hangin'? I'm pretty good myself. I was actually wondering if you could get Patty for me? We had an awesome time last night, and I wanted to see if she'd like to catch a movie or something. Maybe a mosh pit." The self proclaimed god fell to the ground with a smack as Kid's fist hit him hard in the face.

"Shut the hell up, you bastard! You're not going anywhere near Patty." Black*Star sat up, rubbing his bruised cheek gently. He laughed coldly.

"Kiddy has a little crush on Patty, does he? How cute." He brushed himself off as he stood. "Cute, but ridiculous nonetheless. Now, if you'll excuse me." Black*Star headed towards the stairs, but Kid extended his arm in front of him, blocking his path.

"If you take one more step, I'll destroy you." The assassin sneered.

"What's the deal, man? I know you're a controlling freak, but Patty can date whoever she wants. As of now, that "whoever" would be me." It was Kid's turn to smirk bitterly.

"Then you're mistaken. She's seeing me." His golden eyes flickered to the top of the stairs where the girl in question was standing speechless. He smiled kindly at her.

"Come on down, Patty. We need to settle this." The usually perky girl walked briskly and uneasily down the tall staircase, standing three feet away from the two boys. Black*Star gazed at her with relief.

"Yo, Patty!" He said. "Can you tell this jerk to put his arm down so we can get out of here?" Patty bit her bottom lip and approached her green eyed friend.

"Black*Star, last night, I was wasted. Anything that happened after I hit the booze was because of that: the booze. It wasn't me. I'm really sorry, but I just don't feel the way you feel." Black*Star did not deflate, as expected, but rather grinned widely.

"Oh, come on, Patty," He started. "I know you care about Kid and don't want to hurt his feelings, but I knew you were crushing on me since you showed up at the fountain. You can't tell me that wasn't real."

She sighed. "Listen to me-"

"I got this one, little sis." Everyone returned their attention to the top of the stairs, where Liz was standing with a knowing smile. Chuckling to herself, she glided down the steps in her hot pink tank top and fuzzy black sweats decorated with Shinigami skulls. She reached her arm over Kid's and grabbed Black*Star's shoulder. Her gaze was serious despite the wicked smile on her face. Black*Star gulped, unsure of what to expect from the clever blonde.

"Come on. We need to have a talk upstairs." She took his hand fiercely and dragged him up the steps to her room, slamming the door behind her. That left Kid and Patty standing beside each other, not saying a word. Then, Kid broke the silence.

"How about we go get some coffee?" Patty nodded and followed him into the kitchen.

_Meanwhile, In Liz's Room..._

"Liz, if you've got something to say, say it." Black*Star was grinning smugly from the bed, quite certain he was going to walk out of there in less than five minutes. Liz returned the smirk, standing before him, arms crossed over her chest.

"Look, Black*Star, I get that you like Patty. But, unfortunately, she's crazy about Kid. And, if you didn't notice from the little show downstairs, Kid isn't going to let her go no matter what. So, the only logical thing to do is to get you over her." The assassin's grin widened and he stood.

"Oh yeah?" He asked, walking closer to Liz. "And how do yo propose we do that?" He snaked his arm around her waist and pulled her close to him. Liz blushed and her smirk softened to a pleasant smile.

"I've got a few ideas." Black*Star's tan face was tinted with a light blush himself as he lifted her face towards his and planted a kiss on her lips. She smiled from under his lips and broke away.

"What do you say we cut the cutesie crap and get down to business?" She pushed him back onto her bed and crawled on top of him.

_Whoa! Let's go back downstairs, shall we?_

"And, that's when we ended up kissing. Nothing happened beyond that." Kid looked at Patty with questioning eyes. For the past half an hour, she had recanted the events of last night, when she went "over the edge". Finally, his lips curled into a smile.

"I believe you." Patty sighed with relief.

"So does that mean you forgive me?" Kid took Patty's hands in his and kissed her softly on her nose.

"Yes, Patty. I do." A huge grin spread across Patty's face and she shot her hands up in the air. In her baby voice, she shouted.

"Yay! C'mon, Kiddo! Let's got paint some giraffes!" She took his hand again and ran out of the kitchen, heading for the stairs. When they were halfway up, they saw Black*Star walking down the stairs hand in hand with Liz. The two of them were quite ruffled up, to say the least, and they were both grinning knowingly at each other from ear to ear.

Kid understood immediately, and gave them both a hollow laugh. "Just like that, huh."

"Pretty much." Liz replied. The couple pushed past Kid and Patty, continuing down the stairs. Patty merely giggled and resumed running to her room, dragging Kid behind her. For five hours, meister and weapon painted giraffes with red skin and thorny necks, with black and white stripes, and with brown spots splattered across a yellow body.

Around one o' clock, Patty dropped her paint brush and shoved her paintings out of her way, stretching out to sleep. Kid looked over at the beautiful person and smiled. Picking her up off the floor, he moved her to her bed, and gently tucked her in.

"I love you, Patty." Then with a kiss, he shut her door, and left her to dream.

**Jane: **Finally! Everyone's happy! I think my work is done here.

**Kid: **Couldn't have said it better myself. At least now we get to be free from you.

**Jane: **That really, truly hurts my feelings. I had no idea you didn't like me. Grow up, Kid!

**Patty: **Yay! Kid's dating me, I'm dating him, and Black*Star and Liz are friends with benefits.

**Jane and Kid: **…...

**Liz: **Patty! I swear to God, you're so annoying!

**Patty: **Ha ha ha ha ha! I'm hilarious!

**Jane: **That you are. Well, I best be on my way out. Hope you all, er, enjoy yourselves. And to YOU! Thanks for reading! Its been fun, and I hope you liked it! Bye!


End file.
